Friday, June 19, 2009

The Top 5 Reasons Summer Hasn't Even Started Yet

Other than that the calendar summer doesn’t officially begin until the 21st, the following are the top 5 reasons 2009 has more to offer than Star Trek, Up, and Drag Me to Hell (for a more cynical take on the summer movie season, click here).

5) Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
July 15th

Okay, so the series hasn’t had a particularly exciting adaption for a few years now, but that hasn’t stopped you or anyone else for standing in midnight lines and breaking ticket sales records for each subsequent film.

Tagline: Snape kills Dumbledore!

4) Public Enemies
July 1st

I’m starting to get the impression Christian Bale hibernates during the winter. In contrast to his grating performance in “Terminator Salvation,” I’m hoping he pulls a 3:10 to Yuma here and impresses as FBI chief Melvin Purvis, tasked with taking down the notorious John Dillinger (Johnny Depp).

Tagline: It’s like Bonnie and Clyde got in a car crash with America’s most handsome men and you’re the paramedic!

3) Inglorious Basterds
August 21st

I’ve been understandably dubious towards Quentin Tarantino’s latest film, but hit or miss, “Inglorious Basterds” is bound to be a spectacle. Early reviews from the Cannes screening have been fairly positive, so here’s hoping the auspicious director surprises.

Tagline: $12.50? Um, and how much is that in scalps?

2) District 9
August 14th

Neill Blomkamp was original tapped to direct the “Halo” movie, but the project was canned after the budget ballooned out of proportion. “District 9” is a feature-length adaptation of a short film he directed about racism towards alien bugs! I don’t think I can tell you how interesting I think this idea is without sounding sarcastic.

Tagline: Nothing says soaring summer fun like a prejudice metaphor!

1) Bruno
July 10th

As a staunch supporter of Borat, even after the backlash and the inescapable impressions, I couldn’t be more excited for Sacha Baron Cohen’s follow-up piece. Employing the same pseudo-documentary format and avoiding the dregs of narrative (the less said about “Ali G in da House” the better), Bruno is my bet for comedy of the summer.

Tagline: Ron Paul ’12!

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